This Belief is from Wayne W Dyer’s book “Your Sacred Self”, and I call it an Erroneous Belief, because it’s what Society has drilled into us and expects us to follow blindly. It’s something we all take for granted as Truth, and what I’m about to write about will appear to fly in the face of logic and reason.
Erroneous Belief #8 is:
GOALS ARE ESSENTIAL FOR SUCCESS
See what I mean? Aren’t we supposed to have goals in life, and work towards them in order to succeed? Without goals, surely we’d just be faffing about doing nothing and achieving even less? How can this be an erroneous belief? Surely Wayne Dyer is wrong?
When we are growing up, we’re told that getting good grades will get us into the best schools. And that getting into the best schools will eventually lead to us getting the best jobs. And that getting the best jobs will mean getting more money than our peers who only got average grades or went to the local school. And that getting more money equals more success. So, to summarise:
BEST GRADES = BEST SCHOOLS = BEST JOBS = BEST SALARY = BEST LIFE = SUCCESS.
We spent most of our lives chasing the Future, instead of living in the Now. It was not until I read Eckhart Tolle’s “A New Earth” that I realised the truth of the matter, which is that we can only live in the Present or Now, and that the Future only exists as an idea or intention. If we spend all our time chasing the Future, when will we ever really live? When will we ever appreciate what we have now, where we are now, what is happening now, when all we ever look at is the far distant horizon of the Future?
Not having goals is anathema to the corporate business world. Surely we need to have some sort of idea what we want to achieve in that company in the next 5, 10, 15 years? Would you buy shares in a company that has no idea where it’s headed? This is thoroughly inconsistent with all we’ve been taught in school and in our working life. I still remember going to a Management Course in 1998 when I worked at the Office of Fair Trading in London. We had to write down our Goals, which had to be SMART i.e Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time-bound. We were taught not to be wishy-washy, but to be very detailed about what we wanted out of life.
Upon looking back, I realise now that it really wasn’t about how WE wanted our lives to be in 5, 10, 15 years’ time. It was all about how we would fit in with our employer’s own agenda, whether we were going to be square pegs in round holes, or Company Yes Men and Women. All those Goals were tailored around the employer’s requirements, not our own. So where did our own lives figure in SMART? Nowhere, that’s where.
Now, taking that SMART model into my own life, at this point, is futile. I have an inkling of my Life Purpose, and I know that I want to continue writing and making Art, and somehow help other people’s lives in that way. I also know that, if I had the means or opportunity, I would really, really want to run a refuge for dogs, and provide housing and work for the homeless at the same time. I know that somehow my writing and Art will be key towards creating that Dog Sanctuary. And I know that giving homes to the homeless as well as jobs taking care of the dogs, will give them a sense of their own Life Purpose and raise their sense of self-worth. What I don’t know, at this stage, is just how I’m going to be able to do that, without having any money to my own name, or any collateral that I can use, without a suitable plot of land and outbuildings and chalets for the dogs and people. I probably come across as crazy for even considering this as a Life Purpose.
But I trust that the Universe will handle the little details. I trust that if I keep my feet moving, one in front of the other, in the general direction of that Idea, the Universe will construe to put things in my path to help me achieve that. When there’s a will, there’s
relatives a way, right. I’m not going to stress about the details or the outcome, I’m just going to enjoy the ride. And I’m sure the destination will be as wonderful as can be. I believe my Life Purpose isn’t at all wishy-washy, but rather it is more real than ever, because now I’ve written it down and perhaps it will be read by the person or persons who may well be the key to unlocking the floodgates and letting the river flow. And that events will be set in motion to bring about results. So mote it be!
As a young child, I dabbled in writing stories, and my Mother gave me an old ledger book to write them in. To this day, I can still see in my mind’s eye the pages with my childish scrawls telling the stories of dogs and cats, and space travel (yes, really). As teenagers, a school friend and I set out to write a fantasy book together, where I would write about the adventures of my cast of characters and she would write about hers, and in the third part of the book, everyone would come together to defeat the dragon/demon/boss hog. I finished my story, but sadly she gave up on hers, so that book never came to being. When I was living alone in my Grade II listed apartment in West Norwood, a leafy suburb of London, I wrote several stories about the tenants of my block, without actually having met any of them. When I was pregnant with The Kid, I made up stories about how his childhood would be, what my aspirations were for him, how my labour would be, etc etc.
As I write this, I’ve come to realise that I’ve actually been a writer all along, even though I never acknowledged it to myself. I thought writers had to be published and make a living out of doing it. But here I am, an unpublished writer, writing for the love of words and of getting my memories onto paper, well, not exactly paper, but at least out of my head and perhaps someday onto print for The Kid to read and remember his Mother by.
And if the Universe decides that my dream of running that Dog Sanctuary isn’t going to be a reality, perhaps The Kid might be inspired by me to make that His Dream. And that would be perfect too. Maybe that is the Universe’s intention for us all along, and I’m not going to argue with it, because it would be exactly what the Universe ordered.
You just need to follow your Sacred Self, without the need for a detailed itinerary or map. Just relax, and let it go. Everything will be alright.