LIES: The Untold Story

Here is an experimental technique I’m trying out, to write a cohesive and comprehensible story using only images/quotes found on Google, linked by a few words.

Everything you read here is the semi-biographical truth of one aspect of my real life. Read it and weep, or laugh. Whatever floats your boat. I wept last year, this time round I’m laughing at the ridiculousness of it all.

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…and it did.

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…and pictures, videos, emails, chat, messages etc. They were all put to good use.

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And even if it never gets to the bed, due to geographical differences, if you’ve entertained lustful thoughts and acted them out online with each other, then, my dear, you are an adulterer. I don’t care what your sainted mother or priest or friends all say, of course they would back you up, they only know your side of the story.

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It’s as old as the hills. Truth be told, She’s as old as the hills too…

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She said…

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…but she turned out to be a serial cheetah. And a man-eating tiger too.

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So, you either lied to Her, or to Me. Or to both of us. It doesn’t matter, it still makes you the Boy Who Cried Wolf. How do I know when you’re telling the truth anymore, or if you ever did, for that matter? I’ll just err on the side of caution, and treat everything you say or do as a lie. That way, I can either be justified, or otherwise pleasantly surprised, and never disappointed.

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Me too, oh me too! It would certainly keep the house warm all winter.

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…and these days I can hardly see it anymore…it’s really teeny tiny…

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Finally, I managed to get him to squeeze out an admission of guilt. But not of remorse. So in turn I forgave, but did not forget. Without remorse, an expression of guilt made by coercion is useless. If the person does not believe he’s done wrong, he’ll continue doing it. As was the case here.

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Unfortunately, he perhaps lacked the ability to understand the consequences of his ongoing subterfuge. Or maybe the cake was too tasty to give up that easily…

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…I’m just sayin’. Listen up, boys! When a woman asks you something, she already knows the truth and is just waiting to catch you out. Why do you suckers always fall for it?

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…and boy was I pissed off. Too many times to count. Until one day I decided not to take it personally anymore, and instead became an objective observer. Life is much more fun that way.

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Definitely. Forget what I said earlier about it being teeny tiny. It’s virtually disappeared, my dear.

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What’s that? You have an issue with what I just said? Well, tough, because I’ve had enough of your lies and deceit.

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I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again.

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He must’ve graduated with top honours from the University of Pathological Liars.

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And so here we are now…I have one, he has the other. Or maybe he doesn’t. I don’t know, and it really doesn’t matter anymore, in the grand scheme of things. If this were a horse race, it’s a non-starter.

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