Dealing with Toxic People

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Or…as the other famous saying goes:

What Man does not understand, he fears. And what he fears, he tries to destroy.

I spent a good deal of my teenage years living with a toxic parent. The day I “escaped” was the day I left the country to study in a foreign country. The cloud I had hanging over my head, that “I’m not good enough” cloud, followed me across the skies and ocean. It stayed with me for years, like an unwelcome houseguest, until one day I woke up and decided to slam the door in its face.

There’s a difference, you see, between giving up and knowing when one has had enough.

I refused to accept that my success in Life hinged upon getting that toxic parent’s approval. Nothing I did was ever going to be good enough for them. What was the point in even trying?

I stayed away for years and years, only calling on birthdays and Christmas and the New Year. And even then I had to brace myself for the inevitable onslaught of insults in the name of parenthood. Each time, I came away feeling bruised and battered, and psychologically and emotionally scarred.

Each time I was reminded as to why I stayed away. It was for my own peace of mind.

I’ve worked with toxic people too, over the years. I know the signs of one as soon as I see them. Sometimes they’re very clever at disguising themselves with a thin veneer of friendliness or openness.

But eventually the masks always fall off.

Which is why I would advise anyone living with or working with a toxic person, to remove themselves from there as soon as they can, for the sake of their sanity.

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So, what are the signs of a Toxic person? It’s easy to spot one, when you know what to watch out for.

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Toxic people suck the Life Energy out of you. They raise your stress hormone levels so high that you could actually be physically quivering as you engage with them. Your adrenaline is pumping, and by the time you’ve managed to get away from them, the sharp low that follows can be physically exhausting.

So, learn to recognise the signs. And stay the hell out of the way, for these people will literally steal the sunlight from your soul.

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