Tag Archives: change

I Can & I Will

I’m tired of people telling me what I can or cannot do. How to live, how Not to live. What do they know? They’re not me. How can they presume to know what’s best for me? 

Actually, I got tired of this a while back. But, having to live under the same roof as my ex, (for now, anyway), every now and then he likes to remind me of my limitations. Every now and then the ugly beast rears its head.

“You can’t do this”, “You don’t have the money to do that, so forget it”, “It’s not possible”, “I know it’s not going to work, so don’t even think about it”. Etc etc etc.

I know it’s just his own insecurities talking. He has to try and put me down in order to make himself feel better. He needs to put the blame on someone, and I happen to be the closest. He needs a scapegoat to pin all his personal problems on, wagging his finger at me like I’m the source of all his problems. 

But, you know what? You can’t tell me what I can or cannot do. None of you can. Everything is possible, if I put my mind to it. If I set my intention, and follow through on the clues and signals that The Universe throws in my path, there is no way I cannot succeed in achieving my goal.

This year, my goals are thus:

1. Increase my Finances abundantly, enough for me to buy my ex out of our home. He thinks we’re flogging a dead horse, that we’re throwing good money after bad. But I don’t agree with that kind of defeatist attitude or mentality. If we can keep up with the mortgage payments, until such a time as the property market improves and we can sell the house for a profit, then surely the bank will be happy enough to overlook the arrears and tack it to the back of the mortgage? The ex just wants to run away to live in the Philippines with his (married) girlfriend, that’s why he isn’t too bothered if we lose the house here.

2. Get a job or jobs that will give me financial security, from multiple streams of income, if that’s how it has to be. With that I’ll be able to clear my debts and get a home loan at a low rate, to buy our house (as above). But more impprtantly, I would like to start up my own Crafts business online – maybe on Spotify, or on Facebook or even through a Wix website. I know this is possible, and I’m working on it. I’m also researching the pros and cons of becoming a pet groomer…should I do a certified course in pet grooming? Is it something I want to do? Will I enjoy it? Will I be able to get a job doing it? 

3. Buy/win/be gifted a Mazda CX-3 car in Soul Red Crystal. I am in love with that colour, every time I see it on the roads now I get a little frisson of delight up my spine. I can envision myself sitting in the car, driving it, oh yes, please, and Thank You, Universe!

I Can & I Will, Watch Me!

(Images sourced from: Pinterest)

Land Of The Free…?

The “Scarcity” model that Society imposes upon us is one big fat lie. Society needs us to believe that there’s not enough Money out there for everyone, that the rich can only get richer and the poor poorer. That we are not beautiful enough as we are, so we need this makeup, these clothes, those shoes, that cream, go on that diet, eat this, don’t eat that, try this gym, buy this, buy that etc. 

It’s simply how Society operates. It needs us to do all that, in order to ensure its own survival. And the mode of exchange, the currency if you wish, is Money. 

It’s human nature that the more you’re told you can’t have something, the more you want it. Forbidden fruit tastes better, right 😉. The set-up therefore, or the carrot in front of the donkey, is to make something so attractive and desirable that you Just have to have it. And then make it seemingly unattainable, by pricing it out of the ballpark. 

But by then you want it so much, because mainstream Media has bombarded you with marketing campaigns, ads, teasers, freebies…your Want becomes your Need, and then you decide you can’t live without it, so you’re willing to get it at any price.

That’s when you start looking at credit cards, loans, payment plans, laybys etc. Your object of desire lies in the future, so you make yourself live in the future in order to obtain it, by going into debt. 

There are certain things you just can’t avoid paying for…like a roof over your head, for example. If you Rent, you’re essentially only borrowing your home from someone else, and could be turfed out if things go wrong. If you Buy, then the house is the carrot and you have to keep chasing it by paying regular instalments to the bank…because it’s actually the bank that owns the property, not you. Sure, you may pay it all off eventually, but again, that reality is in the future.

But do you know something? All that I’ve just said above – they’re First World problems. Here we are, squabbling over who gets the best bargain in town, which wine is the best, who the classiest celebrity is, where the best holiday deals are…when elsewhere in the world, people are dying of hunger and thirst, being exploited, being blown to pieces. 

And you don’t even hear about these things. Because the Media doesn’t want you to know. The Media in cahoots with Society just wants you to keep spending your Money. It helps Society control your thoughts, your spending habits, your very lives.

Yup, Society has it all sewn up alright. Nobody owns Mother Earth, yet people are not free to pitch their tents on any piece of earth they like and call it Home. Nope, somewhere along the line some smartarse or congregation of smartarses decided that the Land belongs to the Government and that everyone who wants a piece of it Must Pay. Look, they even steal Land from the original people who were there first, millennia ago. Original tribes who lived on and off the land, peaceably minding their own business, there’s plenty to go round, no need to squabble, spread out, go forth and multiply…until the Invaders arrived, that is. 

Whatever happened to “Land Of The Free”? First the Land was Free, then it wasn’t. First the People who lived on the Land were Free…then they weren’t. Ever heard of the word “Slavery”? 

“Free” has 2 notable connotations, both used in this context. The first – not having a pricetag, not for sale, available for use by everyone, having no monetary value of exchange. The second – not restricted in movement, not prevented from going about one’s daily business, not shackled in chains, not “owned” by someone else.

Land rights is just one specific example. There are too many examples of how Society has created slaves out of Humankind, by imposing manmade rules and regulations, and telling us “This is just the way it is”. Like some catch-all, cure-all phrase that’s supposed to mean something.

Luckily, many people are waking up and deciding to take the fight to the Capitol. We will be slaves no more, bowing at the altars of false gods. What was once Free MUST be Free again. One small victory at a time. 

(Image source: Pinterest)

In The Pink

Thought I’d be a girly girl today and go all pink. 

Just because I can.

This is going to be the year I turn my life around. This year I will reclaim my life, my way. No one will ever dictate to me again how to live, what to do, who to love. I will practise Positivity, Affirmations, Visualization, Gratitude and the Law of Attraction. 

Let’s start with my Divorce, which will be heard in Court in 2 weeks’ time. A very good place to start, for all endings are new beginnings. I am Woman, hear me roar.😊

(All images are from Pinterest)

Doorways

I was looking through Pinterest and came across this beautiful photo of an open doorway and the view beyond:

Doors and doorways are intriguing. A closed door symbolises much more than a slam-in-your-face kind of “No”; on a positive note, it holds the promise of better things, riches and wonders, new adventures. Doorways, with or without doors, tease us with tantalising glimpses of what lies beyond, if we only dare to cross the threshold.

(All images sourced from Pinterest)

Doorways invite us to step out, and metaphorically speaking, they invite us to step out of our comfort zone. To take that one small step that may turn into the greatest adventure you’ve ever known.

Doorways can be so inviting and alluring. Will you dally awhile where you are, admiring the vista ahead of you…or will you step over the threshold?

What wonders await you beyond this doorway? (This one is of Tintagel in England, the fabled birthplace of King Arthur. I’ve actually been to this very place, and it is every bit as magical as you see it). 

The view from a window can be equally awesome…but windows (unless they’re full-length French windows) are small and obscured by the wall they’re built into, which acts like a mental barrier curbing the imagination. Doorways lack that kind of inhibition.

Looking at all these doors and doorways, I can’t help but wonder if that which you are seeking is out there, seeking you in return? What is the view like from the other side, I wonder? 

Would you look back? 

Musical Chairs

…Well, Musical Furniture, actually.

As in, having a good old clear out of my son Jack’s bedroom. All in one fell swoop.

I’d been meaning to get the book “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying” by Marie Kondo, hoping it would grant me an insight as to how to tidy up my house once and for all. The book was $20 at Big W, but before purchasing it, I checked ISSUU on my mobile phone, to make sure it wasn’t already available there for free.

Well, surprise, surprise, it WAS available to download on ISSUU. Not just preview pages either, but the book in its entirety. Completely FREE. Hurrah! I just saved $20. Yay, happy dance!

One of the main principles taught by the KonMari technique (a play on words invented by Mari herself, based on her name), is to NOT and I repeat, NOT, tidy things up a little at a time. No, one should rather go whole hog and tackle everything at once. Be brutal as well as swift. 

So today I tested out that theory with Jack’s room. His is a double sized bedroom, but over the years he’s somehow accumulated so much stuff aka junk, that it resembles a cave. A very messy, cluttered and dare I say it, smelly cave.

So this afternoon after school, we basically moved most of Jack’s things out of his room, and then played the furniture version of Musical Chairs.

The results are most encouraging. But man, am I knackered! 😄

The state of Jack’s room…and this is its “natural” state! 

So much junk on every surface! 

Jack’s bed used to be a single, then when he outgrew it (he’s 6′ 4″ now at just 14 years old and still growing at a phenomenal rate!) I swapped his single for the sofabed that was languishing unused in the spare room (aka the “Junk Room” where everything gets chucked). When my finances allow for it, I’ll get him a proper Queen sized bed.

Mid-way through Musical Furniture. The metal shelves have been moved from one side of the room to the other. The white chest of drawers needs to move across to the opposite side of the room.

Nearly there. There’s still a lot of junk to throw out or donate to charity, and Jack knows he only has til Saturday morning before I get the removals people to come pick up what we no longer want to keep. The posters have to come off the wall, and all the Blu-Tack removed. So much more cleaning up to do!!

Originally, Jack had 1 Dreamcatcher each on opposite walls. I simply used a stick I’d picked up from a park, balanced both Dreamcatchers on it, and used a purple chain Jack had to hang it on the wall above the bed. Hey, it works! 

Ahhh! So much roomier now! 😄 Jack’ll sleep well tonight, I reckon!

Change is Scary

You’d have thought, that as a veteran of moving houses and countries (22 house moves and 6 countries in the last 46 years) I’d be ho-hum and blasé about my next house move. But yup, truth be told, it’s one Big Scary New Adventure to me.

But I’ve burnt my bridges. Some of those bridges I burnt with the help of relatives and friends – they handed me the matches. I’m not saying cutting off ties is the recommended thing to do, but there comes a time in everyone’s lives when you have to live for yourself, choose your own path, carve out your own niche, stop conforming, break free of Society’s constraints and do your own thing. And sometimes, those relatives and friends, whether they mean well or whether they’re pulling you down to their own level of misery, just have to be let go, in order for you to move on.

Sometimes, the only thing compelling you to move forwards is the knowledge that there’s nothing left to go back to. Once you realize that there’s nothing left to lose, you suddenly become braver and more inspired to change.

In a few weeks’ time, I’m downsizing to a smaller home, a rented home. But one in which I hope my dreams can not only stay alive but flourish. 

I stand on the precipice, waiting to leap out into the unknown, hoping the net will appear. It’s like being on a rollercoaster, as it’s inching and creaking its way to the pinnacle, right before the sheer near-vertical drop at the start of the ride. Where you hold on to the rails for dear life, and if you dare look down your heart jumps up into your throat from sheer anticipation. You know it’s safe…or is it, really? You’ve seen other people completing the circuit without mishap…but there’s always a first time and accidents do happen, right? Should I get off? What if I fall?

Oh, but my darling, what if you fly?

Here are some inspirational quotes I’ve curated from Pinterest, which I’m pinning here to bolster my own confidence, as well as to help any of you, my dear readers, who may need it right now.

Wish me luck!

Not All Who Wander Are Lost

I’ve been admiring the poems of young talent Erin Hanson, who writes as “e.h” aka “The Poetic Underground”. And I came across this one, which resonates strongly with me and is also a very relevant lesson that everyone should heed.

Remember, the next time you come across one of those New Age, Bohemian, Free Spirit, Rebel, Renegade types: not all who wander are lost. Maybe, just maybe, these folks have found themselves, and are enjoying and appreciating everything The Universe has to offer. And instead of looking at them with pity or scorn, try looking at them with fresh eyes.

(Image source: Google Images)

30 Days of Gratitude : #24

#24: What challenge are you grateful for?

I’m grateful for this challenge called Life. Some people appear to have all the luck – being born into rich, affluent or influential families, having the right connections, moving in the right circles, going to the best private schools, money is no objection, etc etc. Their entire lives are mapped out for them, from cradle to grave. They grow up, go to work, get married, buy a house, have kids, pay their bills, retire and die.

How boring. 

My life is nothing like that described above. There is no road mapped out for me to just follow til the end. In fact, there is No road to speak of. Well, if there was, it’s covered over by desert sand and has tumbleweeds rolling across it. 

I’m sure I’m not the only one wandering around, there must be a few million others in the same position as me, only we each have our own journeys and destinations, and no two are identical. Chances of me meeting anyone on this path are miniscule indeed. 

But, no matter. In fact, remember the saying, “Not all who wander are lost?” We just appear to be lost, because our private journeys are so vastly different from Society’s preconceptions, so strange and quixotic and erratic. But in actual fact, we have aims and intentions just like other people, only our trajectory is more Brownian than predestined by Society or our parents. We do not conform, we are the bohemians, the dreamers, the artists, the Life Changers.

Either that, or we’re aliens 😄.

(Google Images. Poem is “Ode” by Arthur O’Shaughnessy)

Law of Attraction Quotes

Just sharing with you some of my Pinterest curated quotes on how the Law of Attraction works. It’s working for me, and there’s no reason why it shouldn’t work for you too. Give it a try! 

The Beginning Of The End

I served the papers on him today

This marks the beginning of the end

The journey has taken 6 years

And 1 day to be exact

To get to this point

But the light at the end of the tunnel

Is definitely Not an oncoming train

It’s definitely the Light to Freedom

An Opportunity to begin afresh

A new life

New possibilities

A Chance to live on my own terms

His only response was

“How do you feel about it?”

And my reply was Honest,

Truthful and To The Point:

“It doesn’t matter how I feel.

Because if it did, we wouldn’t 

Be having this conversation”.

He should have thought about that

Before he decided to break his vows


R.I.P Marriage

12.12.2010 – 13.12.2016

Never Again